Rain

It started out as a simple June Gloom day, and later I noticed that it was misting. Finally it actually rained for a little while, but hardly enough to pull our yard out of its seasonal brownness. Trying to conserve water here means that the grass is never greener in our yard, and the bucket in the shower has to suffice for the front flower boxes.

JT and I made it through the first half of the week - which is good. The international nursery school he was attending is now in summer session. (why their regular session ends the week before finals week at UCSD when they consider themselves a school serving the needs of the University, I do not know, but there are many other irksome things about the school as well, even though mostly JT's experience was quite positive.) And since we need to save some money, since some of us (ahem, me) don't have jobs, JT is not attending. So, for the month of June he will be home Mon-Wed and at German school Thursday-Friday. Then in July, he has a week off, three weeks of "camp" at German school, and then a whole month of just me and him. I am not sure if I will make it. Sometimes I just don't feel like playing trains or reading another book. (At least he has picked out some good ones at the library lately - the worst are the "Easy reader" books with dumbed-down vocabulary. One favorite at the minute is "Pictures fromOur Vacation" by Perkins. Another is "Pigs Aplenty, Pigs Galore" by McPhail.)

Most of the time when I feel overwhelmed or need a break (i.e. I try to tell him to just go play in his room, which is a ridiculous request since he just wants to be with me), I just need to take a breath and remember that he is small, soon he will not want to spend as much time with me or need me in the same way, so I should just enjoy it. But sometimes, I just want my "moles" to myself and want to be able to talk on the phone with the insurance company without someone yelling in my ear or crying because the picture I drew of him didn't look exactly like the picture I drew of myself. And I wonder if he perhaps needs his hearing checked because he is always asking "What? What did you say?" - not just when I am muttering to myself, but also when I am trying to answer his questions.

I also get annoyed too easily. For example, yesterday I went to vote. JT rode his tricycle and I walked over the the church on the corner and once my name was not found on the list, I realized that the church listed on my voting booklet was a different church, one a couple of blocks in the other direction. I found this quite annoying since the first church was literally 150 yards from our front door. I almost decided not to vote. (Besides, the things and people I vote for NEVER win, which is another story.) But I did my civic duty and the second church even offered drinks and snacks, so all was good. Which reminds me: Obama - Clinton!!! That would be a great ticket. It might be enough to give me some hope for this country after all. (Today on NPR I heard a bit of a program about Robert Kennedy's assassination and how many people lost faith in politics after he died. I think that those feelings for that generation were similar to feelings some of my generation had when Al Gore "lost" the election.)

Alright, enough politics, I am getting misty again, and it is already too humid here - I am making JK's birthday cake tomorrow and the kiddo picked it out - raspberry vacherin, which is a cake with layers of meringue, raspberries, chocolate and whipped cream. Yikes. Doesn't he know that my meringues always turn out chewy?